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Ah, the spiritual narcissist—a fascinating product of the human search for meaning. Though spirituality tends to direct your focus on abating the ego, some seekers end up diving so deep into their own journey that it becomes their entire personality, making their ego bigger than ever before. And with a big ego comes lots of bluster, prescriptive rants, and an energy that generally feels far from healing. (This character tends to show up repeatedly in the yoga space.)

Although directly confronting a spiritual narcissist is ill-advised (challenging a belief system that intense isn’t beneficial for anyone’s well-being), you can make your interactions with them more tolerable by pondering what you could say. After all, a good internal giggle never hurt anyone.

Here’s what we wish we could (safely) say to the spiritual narcissist.

1. Spirituality is not a personality.

2. Gurus are not self-appointed.

3. With each exhale, allow your ego to soften and dissipate.

4. I can’t believe you’re the first human to discover ancient wisdom!

5. You do not have authorization to access my chakras.

6. No, cutting up your parent’s credit card you still use is not taking a vow of poverty.

7. It must take a lot of energy to stay so disconnected from reality.

8. You’re clearly channeling something—we’re just not sure if it’s spirituality.

9. Please stop centering yourself while teaching class. 

10. You are not anyone else’s healer.

11. Perhaps someday your impressive path will guide you toward authentic empathy.

12. It’s amazing how you float just off the ground and still manage to look down on everyone.

13. Keep your hands to yourself.

14. Consider how much you can learn from those around you rather than how much they can learn from you.

15. Without the right intention, “sitting in ceremony” is just doing drugs.

16. If your third eye is so open, why can’t you see the issues with your behavior?

17. Being dismissive of the person working the front desk at the studio? Not exactly goddess behavior.

18. You seem more focused on raising your follower count than your vibration.

19. Each time you bring up your kundalini awakening, unprompted, in common conversation, please do 108 Sun Salutations.

20. You talk about transcending the ego quite a lot for someone who seems to value theirs above all else.

21. Healing work is about the participants’ experience, not your performance.

22. Are you trying to manifest…compliments?

23. Your light will be better appreciated when you stop overshadowing everyone around you.